The Fantastic John Holmes Book Club was founded amidst the turmoil of the Estonian Revolution of 2003. A brief but tumultuous conflict, the revolution occurred when the president of Estonia, Pedro Heffey, threw a banana cream pie into the face of revolutionary leader Augustus Heron. The JHBC, being fierce supporters of Mr. Heron's Super United Killers of Inequality in Estonia (SUKIE), joined musical forces to create the awesomely inspiring sound track for the revolution. However, SUKIE failed miserably in her bid to overthrow the Estonian government, and the JHBC was forced to flee by hay-wagon across the Estonian/Scottish boarder in the middle of the night on New Year's Day 2004.
Since arriving in Canada, by dog sled, in 2008 the members of the JHBC have worked tirelessly to fit into society as best they can. Lenjamin Hudson, a father of nine, works valiantly as an Estonian interpreter for the Chinese consulate. Cameron "Papa Jones" Switzer makes tooth-picks in a factory in Sarnia; in May he was awarded the prestigious Woody Award from the Wood Counsel of Canada for his work in creating a finer and more resilient tooth pick. Gustavo "Lowenbrow" Granados-Ocon shot Estonian president Pedro Heffey. Since this act of defiance against tyranny Gustavo has been in hiding with the Jewish underground somewhere in the North York region. As for Phil, he is just a guy we know. He likes widdling driftwood into pipes, and talking in Spanish.
The John Holmes Book Club is here to rock you! But beware, this band bites!
